Profile, Usernode and BuddyList

I’ve created an alumni website and would like to disallow the general population access to user profiles unless they are on one’s BuddyList.

So, the plan was to:

A) Not allow User Profile access (for the general role)
B) Create a MyFriendsView which would display certain select details for users on one’s BuddyList.

Here’s the problem, without giving permission to access a user’s profile I don’t see a way of giving the general public access to the "Add to BuddyList" button (which is in the User’s Profile.)

What are my options?
thx